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A Platitude and A Final Understanding

from Dead And Loving It by Bad History Month

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lyrics

A Platitude

I scream
for ice cream.
And when it comes
I feel sick.
With guilt and regret,
for throwing a fit.
I bit the tit of The World,
but still got fed.
Fed up with myself,
I scream
for a new attitude.

I’m hateful.
I’m hateful.
It’s shameful
to be so ungrateful.
I lack nothing but that.

I’m lucky.
I’m lucky.
I’m lucky.
I win.
I’m lucky.
I’m lucky.
I’m lucky.
I see:
There’s plenty.
There’s plenty.
There’s more than enough for me.
Go ahead help yourself, it’s free.
Go ahead help yourself, it’s free.
Go ahead, help yourself,
good luck.
There’s more than enough Fuckups.


A Final Understanding

“I finally understand!”
Over and over and over and over and over
again and again and again...
And I start to make plans,
based on my newfound perspective,
but it doesn’t work out,
I freak the fuck out too soon,
over and over and over.
So now, what can I do?
Trapped in these seemingly separate lives,
and trying to get on the right side,
and failing, and hating myself
for being dumb enough to try.

I’ve got an angel and a devil
perched upon opposing shoulders
and their coaxing and opinions
poach attention from the center.
And I’m staring at the mirror saying:
“The center is where my head is.”
And in the center of my head, I feel the root of Imagination,
and I focus my attention and watch my facial features fading,
and I hollow out my head
and kill The Myth of Separation.
And those formerly sworn enemies crawl into the husk of my head,
and embrace in dirty fucking, and my body is their soft bed,
and there is no dirty talking, that noisy train has left the station, bearing words which serve no purpose but to kill communication
with the actual world of actual satisfaction
I’ve been chasing like a tail...

And I finally understand.
Over and over and over and then finally
it’s over.

credits

from Dead And Loving It, released November 3, 2017

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